Thursday, June 3, 2010

Battle of the Bulge

I have been dreading writing about my struggle with weight for awhile now.  I think it has to be done though in order for me to organize my thoughts and get a tenuous grip on what is preventing me from getting to my ideal weight and staying there! 

I know this topic has been written about many times by many people, but it is something that a lot of us deal with everyday.  How many mornings have I woken up with the thought "today is the day I start that diet" running through my head, only to cave in minutes later and have some ice cream for breakfast?  I am so tired of the back and forth; restrict calories, go hog wild, restrict calories... you get the idea.

A bit of history, I have never been one to eat nutritiously.  As a teenager I survived on junk food.  My favorite lunch was to go "off campus" to the drug store and buy these chocolate creme cakes (hostess I think but don't recall the name) and some doritos, and a diet pop!  Got to save calories where you can right?  Anyhow, I was pretty thin then!

When I was married at 16 years of age, I weighed a mere 117 at 5' 6 1/2"  so I was pretty slender.  Gradually, after quitting smoking, having a couple kids, and gaining WAY too much with each pregnancy, as well as aging, and the dreaded slowing of metabolism, I packed on quite a bit of weight.  At one point I was up to 226 lbs~ Also, get this, somewhere along the way (weigh) I "lost" 1/2 an inch!  Weird huh? 

A few years ago I had surgery to remove my gall bladder and was told I had a "fatty liver."  Since this was at the height of my weight gain, I am sure I had a fatty everything!  I decided to lose weight so I could avoid heading down the family path of heart disease, stroke and diabetes.  I took a sensible approach.  I decided that I would eat smaller amounts, and make better choices, but if I REALLY wanted something, I would have it.  I would eat real food.  The same thing my family ate.  At a party, if there was cake, and I really wanted a piece, I would have a small piece  knowing that it would slow my progress.  In other words, I made conscious choices about what I ate.  I lost 67 lbs!  I felt good.  I had energy.  I looked good.  It was great! 

I stayed at this weight for about 2 years and then gradually, as life changes set in and stress in various areas of life overcame me, I packed on 30 lbs.  So, for the last 2 years, I have been trying various diet plans, waking up with the Today is the Day thoughts, and buying all the magazines that promise I can lose 30 lbs in a month.  Recently, I have tried the latest HCG hormone diet, which does work, IF you can stand the 500 cal diet plan, but the weight comes back on FAST if you don't phase off over a two week period.  I thought it would give me a jump start but I couldn't maintain it...

So, here I am and a family reunion is right around the corner.  I have til June 25th to lose 30 lbs.  Any ideas?

3 comments:

Martha said...

Getting older does seem to slow us down, everyday I tell myself, must exercise today! I don't listen to myself very often. I think getting into a "routine" sometimes helps, and not eating out -I think eating out is one of the worst causes of weight gain. Good Luck!

CSD Faux Finishing said...

I have always been a silver lining kind of girl so I just gotta first & foremost congratulate you on losing 37 pounds :-) That is quite an achievement & that you have kept it off is progress!

Our household members have seemed to swell over the past couple years too, we're just trying to eat better and exercise now. My husband bought a bike to get to & from the subway and I bought a treadmill so I can walk everyday. Sometimes we both do, sometimes not, but most important don't beat yourself up because every little bit does indeed help!

Tracie said...

So true ladies. Now that the weather is getting rainy again, I think I will go back to the gym and try the old treadmill!

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